Helmet Head

When you bike every day one of the things you have to deal with is helmet head. Obviously you want to look good when you get to work. However a bike helmet sometimes can be a hairstyle killer.

If I had complete control, my hair would look like Louise Brooks’ hair every day:

But it doesn’t.

Some might dispense with helmets or dispense with biking in exchange for awesome hair. I’ve decided to embrace helmet head and work with it. I’ve found I can easily adapt any hair mess into some very popular hair styles.

For example, if I bike in a headwind I’ll do this look called the “Jackie:”

Helmet Head: Jackie
If there’s no wind at all I have the “Sound of Music:”
Helmet Head: Sound of Music
If I want a little more volume than this I add some hair product and get “The Walk of Shame:”
Helmet Head: Walk of Shame
On a humid summer day I wrangle my sweaty hair into the “Little Orphan Annie:”
Helmet Head: Orphan Annie
But if I don’t want curls I dry my hair under the hand-dryer at work and turn it into “The Hurricane:”
Helmet Head: Hurricane
If I want to soften that up a little I put a little molding paste in to get “The Warhol:”
Helmet Head: The Warhol
Or I just combine all the hairstyles in one and get “The Courtney Love:”
Helmet Head: Courtney Love

See, there’s no reason to sacrifice safety for your hairstyle.

However if you’re concerned with the look of the helmet itself and don’t think they are chic there is a product for you called a hair-helmet:

Helmet Head: Hair Helmet
I understand they come in two colors- Dutch blonde and Danish blonde.

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6 Responses to “Helmet Head”

  • Amy

    My hair is constantly unruly, no matter what do or wear on my head. I think the “Courtney Love” is the closest to what I sport all the time. But when my hair was long, it was more Farrah Faucet. :)

  • I think I have my hairstyle just right. It took many years but helmets don’t bother it now.

  • Jim

    I’m just glad I don’t have an Ed Asner, though I would wear a Combover helmet.

  • Unclesyd

    One benefit of being a guy is that I buzz my hair really short. I ride/swim/exercise (or any combination of the 3) everyday so my hair never looked good. Still sometimes I will see a hipster with his hair blowing in the wind while he is riding his single speed fixed gear bike and think …. damn if I had hair like that, maybe I would wear a brain bucket.

  • Magnus

    “Some might dispense with helmets or dispense with biking in exchange for awesome hair.”

    Well, and then there are those of us who dispense with hair in exchange for awesome biking. ;-)

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